You know how James Bond has weapons disguised as common objects, like bazooka pens, so he can sneak his weapons past the enemy? Well, what if Obama is a big peacenik president who is like, "I don't like weapons. Weapons are bad. No more weapons." Then the military may need to hide weapons in common objects to sneak them past him.
MILITARY COMMANDER: These aren't bazookas. They're pens. We're just making the military lots of pens.
OBAMA: I dunno. Something seems fishy here. What does the military needs with pens? I thought everyone in it was illiterate and that's why they got stuck in Iraq.
MILITARY COMMANDER: No, that's… Hey, look what I found! It's a bucket that looks approximately the size of your head.
OBAMA: Interesting. Being a very smart person, I do have an intellectual curiosity about such things. Now, if I look at the radius for this bucket and remember the equation for the volume of a cylinder, then… Ahh! I got the bucket stuck on my head!
MILITARY COMMANDER: Quick! Arm up the military before he gets it off!
Yeah, that's pretty much how I envisioned warfare would be like in the 21st century.
Posted by Frank J.
I'm just going to go out on a limb here and say things are not going well for the Republicans. Two years ago they controlled both the White House and the Congress. Soon, they'll be controlling both the Coke machine and the fry station.
~Stephen Colbert
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