Friday, June 23, 2006

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    What happens is each person moves up in Al Qaeda now, so the number three guy is number two, the number eleven guy is now number ten, and the number forty-eight guy is now Howard Dean.
    ~Coulter

Thursday, June 22, 2006

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    It’s official. Yesterday was Dan Rather’s last day at CBS. What a great couple of weeks for President Bush. First he gets rid of al Zarqawi and now Dan Rather. His two biggest enemies.
    ~Leno

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

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    Hillary Clinton called for a Privacy Bill of Rights today. Not to be confused with the Right to Privacy that's already in the actual Bill of Rights, the Privacy Bill of Rights will protect our privacy in ways that the Privacy Act of 1974, the Computer Matching and Privacy Protection Act of 1988, the Video Privacy Protection Act of 1988, the Electronic Communications Privacy Act of 1986, the Children's Online Privacy Protection Act of 1998, the Family Educational Rights and Privacy Act of 1974, the 4th Amendment to the Constitution, and the hundreds of state privacy laws already in effect never could. Most importantly, it will make identity theft a crime.
    For years, I’ve been under the impression that it already was a crime, but apparently I was wrong. I guess that it was just some sort of social taboo, frowned upon but entirely legal. Under President Hillary, identity theft will finally become a serious violation of an actual law, officially defined, on the books, and as rigorously enforced as our immigration laws.

Thursday, June 15, 2006

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    A Navy chief petty officer home on leave from the Middle East was shot and killed by a carjacker in Dallas this weekend. Democrats are now calling for America's complete withdrawal from Texas.
    ~Jake Novak

Monday, June 12, 2006

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    Before criticizing others for being 'mean' to women, perhaps Hillary should talk to her who was accused of rape by Juanita Broaddrick and was groping Kathleen Willy at the very moment Willey's was committing suicide.
    ~Ann Coulter

Friday, June 09, 2006

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    ...where [is] Moore [] going to get $85 million, since everyone knows he's squandered all his movie royalties building a 300-foot, solid gold statue of a Twinkie, toward which he bows down to pray five times daily.
    ~Harvey

Wednesday, June 07, 2006

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    A friend in San Jose, California, gave me a copy of the Republican Primary ballot booklet he received in the mail that is written entirely in Spanish.  Neither he nor his wife speak a word of Spanish, so they will ask that the California school system put them through a Spanish as a Second Language course in order to vote in Mexifornia. 
    ~Jerhad

Tuesday, June 06, 2006

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      An AP poll says Americans are impatient people. One in four get mad while in line at the grocery store. One in five have spoken rudely to someone recently on the phone. The rest of the people didn't stick around to finish the survey.
    ~Jim Barach

Monday, June 05, 2006

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    Researchers have found that oral sex among teenagers has doubled in the last ten years. So who says there is no lasting Clinton legacy?
    ~
Leno

Thursday, June 01, 2006

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    Congressmen in Capitol Hill are receiving thousands of bricks via mail from advocates of a tougher Mexican border. Most of the congressmen welcomed the bricks and promised to use them to build walls to protect their offices from the FBI.