Saturday, May 21, 2005


    China wants to modernize its toilets. Most public toilets there have  no doors, and no running water or soap. In the U.S. that is what we call a "subway".
    ~Jim Barach

    Researchers say there is a good chance of a big earthquake hitting  California in the next 30 years. Well, Duh. They are also predicting  that Robert Downey, Jr. may eventually end up back in rehab someday. 
    ~Jim Barach

    President Bush has endorsed the so-called nuclear option to end  judicial filibusters, but has asked senators to rename it to  something he can more easily pronounce.
    ~Rob Bates

Thursday, May 19, 2005


    Victory at all costs, victory in spite of all terror, victory however long and hard the road may be; for without victory there is no survival.
    ~Winston Churchill

    John Bolton is in danger of being rejected by the Senate because he's  known for abusing subordinates and frequently losing his temper.  Today, President Bush announced his second choice -- Coach Bobby Knight.
    ~Conan O'Brien

    If all that Americans want is security, they can go to prison. They'll have enough to eat, a bed and a roof over their heads.
    ~President Dwight D. Eisenhower


Tuesday, May 17, 2005


They desecrated the Koran? What, is there only one copy? Was it an original? Here in America they take pages from the Holy Bible and use them to wipe their butts. Do you know what THAT'S called? Modern Art.

    The Universal Service Fund fee is going up as much as 18%. That's the tax on your phone bill that provides for internet service for libraries. It's also known as "Porn for the Homeless".
    ~Jim Barach

    There is no absurdity so palpable but that it may be firmly planted in the human head if you only begin to inculcate it before the age of five, by constantly repeating it with an air of great solemnity.