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    One way or the other, we are determined to deny Iraq the capacity to develop weapons of mass destruction and the missiles to deliver them. That is our bottom line.

    ~Bill Clinton, Feb. 4, 1998

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    Good news - the price of gasoline dropped this week. No wonder Dick Cheney was in the hospital.

    ~Leno

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    New York City is getting pay toilets. Twenty pay toilets will be placed around the city. Yeah, twenty…that should be enough.

    ~Letterman

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    Martha Stewart’s "Apprentice” show premiered last night. I don’t wanna say it didn’t do well but tonight on his "Apprentice” show Trump fired her.

     ~Leno

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    We had a huge rain storm here in Los Angeles yesterday. Lightening…thunder… it’s tough living in Beverly Hills when it rains. Nobody from FEMA shows up. You know, I think George Bush doesn’t care about rich, white people.
    ~Leno

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    The deterioration of every government begins with the decay of the principles on which it was founded.

    ~Charles-Louis De Secondat

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Search your State

The complete 2005 Congressional Pig Book is a searchable database of 13,997 pork projects.  Search by keyword, city, state, or appropriations bill.

Search Pig Book by Year:   2005  2004  2003  2002   2001  2000                                              1999  1998  1997  1996   1995

 

 

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    He has erected a multitude of New Offices, and sent hither swarms of Officers to harass our people, and eat out their substance.

    ~The Declaration of Independence

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    American atheists say they want to set up their own lobby in Washington. Of course there are plenty of people in Washington who don't believe in God or divine justice; they're called Congressmen.
    ~Jake Novak

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     I pulled into a full service gas station today and asked for five  dollars worth of gas. The guy farted, took my five and walked away. 

    ~Mickey Hennigan

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   Ireland's worst air disaster occurred early this morning when a small two-seater Cessna plane crashed into a cemetery. Irish search and rescue workers have recovered 1826 bodies so far and expect that number to climb as digging continues into the night .
    ~Tommy Cooper

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    In the wake of Hurricane Katrina, New Orleans police are using the local Greyhound station as a make-shift jail. Usually, it's only the people riding a Greyhound bus who feel like they're in jail.

    ~Jake Novak

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    Most of the trouble in the world is caused by people wanting to be important.

    ~T.S. Eliot

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    Washing one’s hands of the conflict between the powerful and the powerless means to side with the powerful, not the neutral.

    ~Paulo Freire

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    Having learned his lesson, the president replaced the War on Terror with a War on Probabilities and dispatched 20,000 Guardsmen to the west coast to be ready for the big earthquake.

    ~Scott Witt

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    A Washington, D.C. woman was arrested and handcuffed for eating candy on the subway. She was let go after promising to only use the subway station for sleeping and urinating.

    ~Jim Barach

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    New report by ACT. N.C. shows that hundreds of thousands or this year's incoming college freshmen aren't academically prepared to do college level work. On the bright side, there are plenty of colleges out there that don't require students to do college level work. 

    ~Bruce Tinsley

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    Perhaps the only institution more puffed-up and self-important than academia is government.

    ~Neil Steinberg

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    87-year-old Senator Robert Byrd will run for a 9th term in 2006. Byrd vows to stay in office until the U.S. withdraws from Iraq, or he runs through all of Strom Thurmond's remaining supply of adult diapers, whichever comes first.

    ~Jake Novak

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    A House bill mandates 2 year suspensions for illegal steroid use in pro sports. There's no place in any game for unethical behavior, cheating, and inflating ability. That belongs on Capitol Hill.

    ~Alan Ray

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Response to Moore's letter

Hey Hippie

Glad to hear your above using the dead as a soapbox to politicize a national tragedy. Next time you lose your car keys start looking in the folds under your tits to save time.

As for where our rescue copters and National Guardsmen what "the Laft" need to understand is that staging literally thousands of rescue workers and equipment takes time. We have the best rescue people in the world but there is no magic wand that even the President can wave to make things instantly better. Perhaps if Mayor C. Ray Nagin and Louisiana Gov. Kathleen Babineaux Blanco were first concerned about keeping law and order instead of search and rescue missions our private charities could have been in there earlier.

Furthermore, a representative of the Army Corps of Engineers has stated that the critical Levee work was completed, that it was up to designed specs. The problem is, those specs were for a class three hurricane, not a four or five. Secondly of the funds that were transferred to New Orleans over the last decades, were diverted by the local levee boards to buy a Gambling Casino and a private marina. It would appear that the "Big Easy's" reputation for inept governance and corruption is well deserved.

You keep dodging Michael Wislon, Christopher Hitchens, David Harley and when our brave boys and girls in Iraq accomplish their mission, we'll all know it wasn't in your name.

Love ya

Dubya

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    The White House reportedly asked Bill Clinton and former President Bush on Wednesday to head an international relief effort for American hurricane victims. We're about to find out who our friends are. Mexico was the first to offer to send people here.

    ~Argus Hamilton

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    New Orleans sent out a distress call Tuesday after Hurricane Katrina flooded the city. Everyone wants to come to their aid. Two hours after the hurricane was finished Los Angeles sent six planeloads of looters to help out in any way they can.

    ~Argus Hamilton

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    The French government continued high-level discussions about assisting U.S. hurricane victims, as opponents argued that France was not obliged to help since the warranty on the Louisiana Purchase expired long ago.

    ~Scrappleface

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    As if this country doesn't have enough to worry about, as of midnight last night, Martha Stewart's ankle bracelet is off, so look out, she's free. She celebrated by breaking into a Pottery Barn and shop-lifting a sconce.

    ~Jimmy Kimmel

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